Have you ever gotten mad at God? There are times where things just don't seem to fit together like you thought, or you did not get the answer from Him you expected, and life just is not going at all smoothly. I'm not talking about something superficial like you didn't get that new car you asked for. I'm talking about gut wrenching issues, agonizing hurt, after long periods of time pleading. Something that just makes you drop to your knees and scream, Why Lord?
You may be wondering, why Lord. why do the evil succeed? Why do they get away with it? How long, oh Lord, must I deal with this or that situation? Why is it that I never seem to come out on top, Lord? Why is it that I have been alone so long waiting? Have you not heard me? Can't you see that I am hurting? Why have you not delivered me?
I think many of us get to these desperate heart aching points in our walk where we just cannot see or understand the plan God is working in or through us. Times where we almost can't find any words to express the anguish that we are feeling or the desperation that we are experiencing. What are we supposed to do? How are we to carry on when it just seems like the world is falling in on top of us and the bottom has dropped away?
I've been facing such situations recently, so as much as this is sharing with others, it is also a little therapy for myself here. All those types of questions are swirling around in my head, and I am asking and pleading, wondering when is it going to end? What am I supposed to do?
I got a word before the intensity of the situation I am in ramped up several hundred degrees.
Galatians 6:9 And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.
When we are upset and troubled, even wounded deeply to our core, we still need to carry on in a way that is pleasing to God. He made a promise to us in that verse. We can't let our pain become so great that we begin hurting others. We need to keep our focus on God and doing what is right, treating others as we ourselves want to be treated, doing our jobs to the best of our ability, being honest, not being a gossiper, etc etc... If we do those things, we have a harvest coming. We might not know when it is or how it is, but we can rest assured that it will come when it is ripe and ready and perfect for us.
I wish I could say that I have been a perfect soldier in this, but really, it is kind of a hard thing to do. We are hurt and upset and do some things that don't necessarily help, or think we can do something about it and forget that God is the one in control. We can get caught up in our emotions and reap some consequences we'd rather not. That is the hard part about the "faint not" in that verse. We can make things worse when we get like, I got this God.
I think that when we get past the initial "WHY GOD WHY?", we can settle back and look to the word for the practical applications of "how, Lord, how?" Maybe God will bring some useful verse to remembrance like He did for me with the above verse, or we may stumble upon a teacher on the radio or TV that has a message that speaks to our situation, and we should of course look through the word and meditate upon what it says. The instructions on what to do can be found there.
Another hard thing that we should be learning to do in tough situations is learning to trust God even more. It is all well and good to trust God when things are going well, but when things happen and appear to be at their worst, that is when we really need to knuckle down with some serious faith and determined faith that says, despite what I am seeing and feeling, I know that that harvest is out there getting ripe and I have no doubt that if I do as the word says, the blessing is promised to me by God, and God keeps ALL his promises.
Psalm 97:10 Ye that love the Lord, hate evil: The beginning part of this psalm verse gives a Godly perspective on getting angry. We who are believers should get angry when we see evil occurring. We have a right to be angry about evil doings. Proverbs tells us the same thing, Proverbs 8:13 The fear of the Lord is to hate evil:.
We are given some precautions when it comes to being angry. Ephesians 4:26 Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: Our anger should be in control. When we get angry, we should not be flying off the handle and acting impulsively. We are to maintain right thinking even though we are angry. Often in life people let anger get the best of them and then bad things happen. We see an example of this in the racing world recently where an angry driver wanted to after another driver and ended up getting run over and killed because his anger overrode his common sense.
Another thing that often happens in our anger is that we take matters into our own hands. This ties in with the impulsiveness and loss of common sense that can occur when angry. We often want to mete out punishment on the one we are angry at. But we need to remember that we serve God, and we are not him. Romans 12:19 Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord. Let God take care of the matter. We don't have to do anything to anyone other than letting it be known we are angry and why. (part of not letting the sun go down). If something needs to be done, let God do it. He can take care of it much better than we can.
Ephesians 4:31 tells us to, Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: Get the anger out of your system right away. Don't let the sun go down on it. Give it to God to take care of and move one. All of the things listed in this verse can derive from holding on to anger. We take matters into our own hands and we start saying things we shouldn't, and/or talking about it to others which stirs up division. Over time this leads to bitterness and a hard heart. We end up being miserable. This miserable mindset also leads to physical ailments as well. It hurts us far more than it ever hurt the person we were mad at.
The following Ephesians 4 verse reminds us to get back to a Godly attitude. 32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you. But, you don't know what this person has done! You don't understand how long this has been going on! God does. He knows everything. He sees the situations. As believers we have to trust that Romans 8:28 ...all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.
No one said it would be easy. It is never easy to see evil flourish, especially if you are on the receiving end of it. Imagine how Joseph could have felt all those years, being thrown in a pit, then sold as a slave by his own family, falsely accused and imprisoned, forgotten about, alone... Then one day, years later, it all came to fruition. Joseph never would have been ready for that if he had let anger grow into bitterness. Instead, he constantly trusted the Lord and did things in a godly manner and was blessed through, not out of, the difficult situations he encountered.
When we get angry, take it to God in prayer. Tell God how you feel. Express yourself to Him fully. David in the Psalms often prayed in anger at the wicked and asked for God to send wrath upon evildoers. One light example is in Psalm 40:14 Let them be ashamed and confounded together that seek after my soul to destroy it; let them be driven backward and put to shame that wish me evil. David does get harsher in his requests too. Letting it out to God gives us relief from the stress and peace in our minds. Isaiah 26:3 Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee.
In prayer too, if we are listening and not just jabbering (lol), we might receive instruction in how to deal with a situation. I was recently praying about a situation that made me angry and while I stopped and listened, a verse popped into my head, Galatians 6:9 And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not. It was not a resolution to what I was dealing with, but it was a reminder of the importance of my own conduct in the matter and refocused me on what I should be doing, rather than getting sidetracked by what made me angry.
In conclusion, It's OK to get angry for the right reasons. just don't hold on to the anger. Let it out in a Godly fashion. Hand it over to God and let him deal with it. Move forward, continuing to do what God wants us to do. This way we won't cause ourselves further grief and we can trust that God will resolve the manner in the best possible way (but that may be different that what we think should be done).
Matthew 5:44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;
Proverbs 27:6
Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.
As believers in Jesus, we are commanded to be as truthful as we know how to be. Never are we told to lie about anything. In a truthfulness, being that blatantly honest does not necessarily win you any accolades or rewards. In many cases, the truth being told is reviled and scorned, and you, the messenger, end up being at the end of a scathing attack. The truth is not something everyone wants to hear.
People generally become most offended when the truth presented bumps up against the way they see things. When a truth is presented that contradicts their own view, it puts them in a position where they have to admit that they may be wrong. We humans tend to have a lot of pride, and are not willing to concede the possibility of being wrong.
It may very well be that the truth being told will go up against where another has put all their hope and trust. The truth is not just offending pride in this case, but is rattling the very foundations of what another is holding on to for dear life. The truth threatens to tear down their entire view of the world and destroy all that they were putting their trust in. And if it was an only hope, the person is afraid that there is nothing else left to hold on to, that all hope will be lost.
In either case (or any I missed), truth brings out a negative response from the one who is offended with it. It triggers a fight or flight response as a defense mechanism. Often times both occurs. A person confronted by a truth they do not wish to hear will fight the idea, and try to ruin the credibility of the messenger. They will try to deflect this truth and make it about the messenger. They may just dismiss it altogether so as not to have to deal with it.
I think this issue can be summed up well when we look at the 5 stages of grief. The 5 stages of grief are commonly accepted as follows:
1. Denial
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. Acceptance
When a person is first confronted with a truth that contradicts them, they will go into denial, and then anger rather quickly. They don't like the truth. they don't want to hear that truth. They are offended by that truth. They will lash out against it. This is where most of the conversation ends. People usually end the conversations at this point. They will say something like, well, we will just have to agree to disagree.
The bargaining stage is something that may or may not occur later on. They may take to heart the truth that has been told, or they may just go back to denial and move on. This is where the Holy Spirit is at work. As someone wrestles with truth in their mind and heart, they are no longer wresting with the messenger, but the message. They have begun dealing with the truth. They might slip back and forth with more denial and anger, or slip ahead into depression, but that is part of the bargaining.
The depression stage is where one gives up the struggle. They are not angry any more, they can't deny the truth, and they can no longer negotiate or argue it away. They know what the truth is. They are now there. At this point they either shut it all of and go back to permanent denial, or they move on and accept the truth, embrace it, and go with it.
In the end, this is what truth does to us. Whether it is the truth about our mortality, which is where these stages were coined after, our salvation, or whether it is some other truth we are confronted with. As messengers of truth, believers are often dealing with the front lines, or the first stages in the above process. Sometimes we are put in a position with friends or relatives where we can be involved in assisting with the other stages. As ministers of God, sometimes we are brought in during the bargaining and depression stages to assist in moving on to acceptance.
In the end, truth is what matters. We can't shy away from speaking the truth. We can't be afraid of receiving the wrath of others for sharing truth. We are servants of the Most High God, and it is He who is doing the work, through the messengers, and in the lives of those who hear truth. We are to just be obedient servants and speak the truth in as much as we are given it, and to do so in as loving a way as we know how. It is not easy, but obedience is always rewarded in some fashion.
Acts 26:25
But he said, I am not mad, most noble Festus; but speak forth the words of truth and soberness.
Something just isn't right. For the past several days, in fact, nearly a week now, I have been feeling very unsettled. Things have been bothering me, annoying me. My patience is very thin. I have been finding myself going around upset. This is not like me. Normally I am a very positive person, upbeat, happy, and making jokes. What is going on?
Seems like lately I have been bombarded with stupid. Not just your average everyday stupid, but some real hardcore stupidity. I got people who don't care about their job, doing things wrong and it doesn't even concern them. I've got vandals messing up my work area. Things are breaking and not getting repaired. I have multiple bosses giving conflicting orders and me taking the blame from each for doing what the other said do. People are acting like jerks for no reason.
Recently it has just been like a tsunami of stupid has flooded into my life and I seem powerless to be able to do anything about it. I'm being battered by the idiotic debris and sucked under by the turbulence of imbecility. I'm trying to gasp for air as I bob above the surface for a moment only to be pushed under again by some other ridiculousness pushing me down. HELP! Dwayne the bathtub! I'm dwowning!
Psalm 46:10 (a) Be still, and know that I am God:
Amid all the turmoil and craziness that continues to overwhelm me, I took my 15 minutes break, grabbed a chair, and sat silent in a closet, praying and thinking. No great revelation came to me, but a peace came to me that I had mot felt in a while. I was calm again; relaxed. I felt some of the joy return. I was energized. The weirdness no longer worried me.
I think that is just a little mini lesson for me to do what I often forget to do, and that is just to be still and know the God is God. He is in control of it all. He knows what is happening always and when we love, trust, and obey Him, He will cause everything to work to our benefit. So how is all the recent madness going to be worked for my benefit? haven't a clue. That is for God to do.
Psalm 28:7 The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusted in him, and I am helped: therefore my heart greatly rejoiceth; and with my song will I praise him.
Romans 12:18 If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.
Boy, this is a hard saying. Sometimes it just no longer lies within me to keep my peace. tonight was one of those nights. My nemesis thorn in the side for the last 9 years crossed the line. I let them know in no uncertain terms that they had done so. I asked the boss to intervene and asked that it go up the chain of command. 9 years and nothing has changed, nothing has been done.
People have praised me for being able to put up with so much for so long, but there are limits. We all have our limits. Some days our fuses are a bit shorter than other days and it takes less to light those fuses, and they burn faster. It was just the wrong day to try pulling passive aggressive stunts on me; the wrong day to swear at me and make false accusations in half under your breath but loud enough to hear tones.
As I sit and look at these verses in Romans 12, it gets harder though. What God is asking me to do in the word is beyond me at times. it is not what I want to do. It is not what I feel like doing. I'd like to be able to go back behind the woodshed and open up a can of whoopass. That is not what the word says to do. Oh Lord help me in my weakness.
This little segment of Romans 12 starts out with this admonition, 17 Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men. When we get mad, we are not supposed to act like the world and try to do something to the other person in a sneaky or underhanded way. No backbiting. No lying in wait to set them up. We must be honest in our dealings. Ephesians 4:26 Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath:
We go past our opening verse now to verse 19: Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord. Along with the part of not returning evil for evil, we should not avenge ourselves. Perhaps snapping back in anger was a bit of that, I'm not sure. Telling the boss? It is what we should do in the situation. Taking it silently for so long is sometimes beyond me, so I must ask for God's spirit to infuse me the right things to do.
Verse 20: 20 Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head. This verse parallels the word of Jesus when he said, Matthew 5:44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; Oh, that is so hard and I try so hard to be like this. This kind of attitude can only come through the Spirit of God. It does not lie within me to do so.
This part about pray for them I am hit with in this situation. This person has been my sworn enemy from almost my first day at the job and for reasons that have nothing to do with me. In thier head I am somehow at fault for some percieved wrong years in the past that he cannot seem to let go of. It strikes me at the moment that when we pray for people, especially our enemies, we begin to see them as Jesus sees them, a lost soul in need of a savior just as we were.
verse 21 concludes: Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good. This is hard too, but we cannot let evil people and their ways get the better of us. Being the humans we are, we can only appeal to the holy Spirit to empower us to not be overcome of evil. It is also the Holy spirit that will reveal ways and empower us to to good to overcome the evil.
I don't wish any ill will toward this person, but I do pray they would just go away or change. One or the other. I suppose with Gods sense of humor, I would be the one through which this instrument of change should come about. Things cannot remain as they are though. I am at my limit of being able to live peacably with this person. I've tried the doing good to them. I'm tired and wanted to rant a bit and end up led into a lesson of how I should be acting in this situation. Praise the Lord.
